The Trinity Cake

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As I leaned o'er the rail of the Eagle, The letter boy brought unto me,A little gilt edged invitation, Saying the girls want you over to tea,Sure I know the O'Hooligans sent it, And I went, just for ould friendship sakeWhen the first thing they gave me to tackle, Was a slice of the Trinity Cake.

Cho: -- There were bird-calls, flutes and mouth-organs, With handles of double edged files, Corners of clergymen's pockets, And pieces of broken bass voils. Blue lights and petticoat jumpers, That would build up a fine stomach ache, For 'twould kill a man twice after eating one slice, Of this wonderful Trinity cake.

Mrs. Hooligan, proud as a peacock, Kept smiling and blinking away,While her daughter Johanna, a spinster, Was helping the boys to the tea,There was everything on the table, That a man or a woman could take,And my eyes nearly bust from their sockets, For a taste of the Trinity Cake.

Ellen Reardigan wanted to taste it, And she struggled near ready to bust,When the sealers attacked it with hand-spikes, To try and remove the top crust.Then McCarthy went out for a hatchet, And Flanningan grabbed an old sawThat cake was enough, be the powers, To paralyze every man's jaw.

McCarthy complained of the stomach, And Moran felt bad in the headAnd Hogan crawled near the melodian, And prayed that he wished he was dead,And Flannigan grabbed the harmonian, And there he did wriggle and shake,And all of them swore they were poisoned or more, From eating this wonderful cake.

Cho: -- There was glass-eyes, bulls-eyes and butter, Lampwicks and Liniment too, Pastry as hard as a shutter, That a billy goat's jaw couldn't chew, Tobacco and whiskers of crackies, That would give you the fever and ache, You'd crack off from the knees, if you happen to sneeze, After eating this Trinity Cake.

© Burke Johnny