On A Wine Of Horace's

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What time I read your mighty line,
  O Mr. Q. Horatius Flaccus,
In praise of many an ancient wine-
  You twanged a wicked lyric to Bacchus!-
I wondered, like a Yankee hick,
If that old stuff contained a kick.

So when upon a Paris card
  I glimpsed a Falernian, I said: "Waiter,
I'll emulate that ancient bard,
  And pass upon his merits later."
Professor Mendell, quelque sport,
Suggested that we split a quart.

O Flaccus, ere I ceased to drink
  Three glasses and a pair of highballs,
I could not talk, I could not think;
  For I was pickled to the eyeballs.
If you sopped up Falernian wine
How did you ever write a line?

© Franklin Pierce Adams