Poetical Epistle to Mrs. Green

Hoping no offence, my dear Madam Green,You're surely the strangest gentlewoman that ever was seen;Didn't you say you'd come and see my drawings, and eat some of my plumb cake,Here I've kept it above a week, and all for your sake,And now it's as hard as a stone, and not worth a pin,To waste so fine a cake is I'm sure both a shame and a sin.Besides, I've staid at home waiting for you morning after morning,But I shan't do so again, and of that I now give you warning.Indeed I consider this matter in a very serious light,And you yourself can't say, it was at all behaving right:So if you don't come very soon, by way of amends,I can assure you, you and I will not be much longer friends:But when you come, don't bring any of your brats,For I hate little children as much as you do cats.So hoping that of engagements in future you'll be more observant,I am, Madam, your most obedient humble servant.