A Reed Shaken In The Wind

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I.

  Not for you and me the path
  Winding through the shadowless
  Fields of morning's dewiness!
  Where the brook, that hurries, hath
  Laughter lighter than a boy's;
  Where recurrent odors poise,
  Romp-like, with irreverent tresses,
  In the sun; and birds and boughs
  Build a music-haunted house
  For the winds to hang their dresses,
  Whisper-silken, rustling in.
  Ours a path that led unto
  Twilight regions gray with dew;
  Where moon-vapors gathered thin
  Over acres sisterless
  Of all healthy beauty; where
  Fungus growths made sad the air
  With a phantom-like caress:
  Under darkness and strange stars,
  To the sorrow-silenced bars
  Of a dubious forestland,
  Where the wood-scents seemed to stand,
  And the sounds, on either hand,
  Clad like sleep's own servitors
  In the shadowy livery
  Of the ancient house of dreams;
  That before us,--fitfully,
  With white intermittent gleams
  Of its pale-lamped windows,--shone;
  Echoing with the dim unknown.


II.

  To say to hope,--Take all from me,
  And grant me naught:
  The rose, the song, the melody,
  The word, the thought:
  Then all my life bid me be slave,--
  Is all I crave.

  To say to time,--Be true to me,
  Nor grant me less
  The dream, the sigh, the memory,
  The heart's distress;
  Then unto death set me a task,
  Is all I ask.


III.

  I came to you when eve was young.
  And, where the park went downward to
  The river, and, among the dew,
  One vesper moment lit and sung
  A bird, your eyes said something dear.
  How sweet it was to walk with you!
  How, with our souls, we seemed to hear
  The darkness coming with its stars!
  How calm the moon sloped up her sphere
  Of fire-filled pearl through passive bars
  Of clouds that berged the tender east!
  While all the dark inanimate
  Of nature woke; initiate
  With th' moon's arrival, something ceased
  In nature's soul; she stood again
  Another self, that seemed t' have been
  Dormant, suppressed and so unseen
  All day; a life, unknown and strange
  And dream-suggestive, that had lain,--
  Masked on with light,--within the range
  Of thought, but unrevealed till now.
  It was the hour of love. And you,
  With downward eyes and pensive brow,
  Among the moonlight and the dew,--
  Although no word of love was spoken,--
  Heard the sweet night's confession broken
  Of something here that spoke in me;
  A love, depth made inaudible,
  Save to your soul, that answered well,
  With eyes replying silently.


IV.

  Fair you are as a rose is fair,
  There where the shadows dew it;
  And the deeps of your brown, brown hair,
  Sweet as the cloud that lingers there
  With the sunset's auburn through it.
  Eyes of azure and throat of snow,
  Tell me what my heart would know!

  Every dream I dream of you
  Has a love-thought in it,
  And a hope, a kiss or two,
  Something dear and something true,
  Telling me each minute,
  With three words it whispers clear,
  What my heart from you would hear.


V.

  Summer came; the days grew kind
  With increasing favors; deep
  Were the nights with rest and sleep:
  Fair, with poppies intertwined
  On their blonde locks, dreamy hours,
  Sunny-hearted as the rose,
  Went among the banded flowers,
  Teaching them, how no one knows,
  Fresher color and perfume.--
  In the window of your room
  Bloomed a rich azalea. Pink,
  As an egret's rosy plumes,
  Shone its tender-tufted blooms.
  From your care and love, I think,
  Love's rose-color it did drink,
  Growing rosier day by day
  Of your 'tending hand's caress;
  And your own dear naturalness
  Had imbued it in some way.
  Once you gave a blossom of it,
  Smiling, to me when I left:
  Need I tell you how I love it
  Faded though it is now!--Reft
  Of its fragrance and its color,
  Yet 'tis dearer now than then,
  As past happiness is when
  We regret. And dimmer, duller
  Though its beauty be, when I
  Look upon it, I recall
  Every part of that old wall;
  And the dingy window high,
  Where you sat and read; and all
  The fond love that made your face
  A soft sunbeam in that place:
  And the plant, that grew this bloom
  Withered here, itself long dead,
  Makes a halo overhead
  There again--and through my room,
  Like faint whispers of perfume,
  Steal the words of love then said.


VI.

  All of my love I send to you,
  I send to you,
  On thoughts, like paths, that wend to you,
  Here in my heart's glad garden,
  Wherein, its lovely warden,
  Your face, a lily seeming,
  Is dreaming.

  All of my life I bring to you,
  I bring to you,
  In deeds, like birds, that sing to you,
  Here, in my soul's sweet valley,
  Wherethrough, most musically,
  Your love, a fountain, glistens,
  And listens.

  My love, my life, how blessed in you!
  How blessed in you!
  Whose thoughts, whose deeds find rest in you,
  Here, on my self's dark ocean,
  Whereo'er, in heavenly motion,
  Your soul, a star, abideth,
  And guideth.


VII.

  Where the old Kentucky wound
  Through the land,--its stream between
  Hills of primitive forest green,--
  Like a goodly belt around
  Giant breasts of grandeur; with
  Many an unknown Indian myth,
  On the boat we steamed. The land
  Like an hospitable hand
  Welcomed us. Alone we sat
  On the under-deck, and saw
  Farm-house and plantation draw
  Near and vanish. 'Neath your hat,
  Your young eyes laughed; and your hair,
  Blown about them by the air
  Of our passage, clung and curled.
  Music, and the summer moon;
  And the hills' great shadows hewn
  Out of silence; and the tune
  Of the whistle, when we whirled
  Round a moonlit bend in sight of
  Some lone landing heaped with hay
  Or tobacco; where the light of
  One dim solitary lamp
  Signaled through the evening's damp:
  Then a bell; and, dusky gray,
  Shuffling figures on the shore
  With the cable; rugged forms
  On the gang-plank; backs and arms
  With their cargo bending o'er;
  And the burly mate before.
  Then an iron bell, and puff
  Of escaping steam; and out
  Where the stream is wheel-whipped rough;
  Music, and a parting shout
  From the shore; the pilot's bell
  Beating on the deck below;
  Then the steady, quivering, slow
  Smooth advance again. Until
  Twinkling lights beyond us tell
  There's a lock or little town,
  Clasped between a hill and hill,
  Where the blue-grass fields slope down.--
  So we went. That summer-time
  Lingers with me like a rhyme
  Learned for dreamy beauty of
  Its old-fashioned faith and love,
  In some musing moment; sith
  Heart-associated with
  Joy that moment's quiet bore,
  Thought repeated evermore.


VIII.

  Three sweet things love lives upon:
  Music, at whose fountain's brink
  Still he stoops his face to drink;
  Seeing, as the wave is drawn,
  His own image rise and sink.
  Three sweet things love lives upon.

  Three sweet things love lives upon:
  Odor, whose red roses wreathe
  His bright brow that shines beneath;
  Hearing, as each bud is blown,
  His own spirit breathe and breathe.
  Three sweet things love lives upon.

  Three sweet things love lives upon:
  Color, to whose rainbow he
  Lifts his dark eyes burningly;
  Feeling, as the wild hues dawn,
  His own immortality.
  Three sweet things love lives upon.


IX.

  Memories of other days,
  With the whilom happiness,
  Rise before my musing gaze
  In the twilight ... And your dress
  Seems beside me, like a haze
  Shimmering white; as when we went
  'Neath the star-strewn firmament,
  Love-led, with impatient feet
  Down the night that, summer-sweet,
  Sparkled o'er the lamp-lit street.
  Every look love gave us then
  Comes before my eyes again,
  Making music for my heart
  On that path, that grew for us
  Roses, red and amorous,
  On that path, from which oft start,
  Out of recollected places,
  With remembered forms and faces,
  Dreams, love's ardent hands have woven
  In my life's dark tapestry,
  Beckoning, soft and shadowy,
  To the soul. And o'er the cloven
  Gulf of time, I seem to hear
  Words, once whispered in the ear,
  Calling--as might friends long dead,
  With familiar voices, deep,
  Speak to those who lie asleep,
  Comforting--So I was led
  Backward to forgotten things,
  Contiguities that spread
  Sudden unremembered wings;
  And across my mind's still blue
  From the nest they fledged in, flew
  Dazzling shapes affection knew.


X.

  Ah! over full my heart is
  Of sadness and of pain;
  As a rose-flower in the garden
  The dull dusk fills with rain;
  As a blown red rose that shivers
  And bends to the wind and rain.

  So give me thy hands and speak me
  As once in the days of yore,
  When love spoke sweetly to us,
  The love that speaks no more;
  The sound of thy voice may help him
  To speak in our hearts once more.

  Ah! over grieved my soul is,
  And tired and sick for sleep,
  As a poppy-bloom that withers,
  Forgotten, where reapers reap;
  As a harvested poppy-flower
  That dies where reapers reap.

  So bend to my face and kiss me
  As once in the days of yore,
  When the touch of thy lips was magic
  That restored to life once more;
  The thought of thy kiss, which awakens
  To life that love once more.


XI.

  Sitting often I have, oh!
  Often have desired you so--
  Yearned to kiss you as I did
  When your love to me you gave,
  In the moonlight, by the wave,
  And a long impetuous kiss
  Pressed upon your mouth that chid,
  And upon each dewy lid--
  That, all passion-shaken, I
  With love language will address
  Each dear thing I know you by,
  Picture, needle-work or frame:
  Each suggestive in the same
  Perfume of past happiness:
  Till, meseems, the ways we knew
  Now again I tread with you
  From the oldtime tryst: and there
  Feel the pressure of your hair
  Cool and easy on my cheek,
  And your breath's aroma: bare
  Hand upon my arm, as weak
  As a lily on a stream:
  And your eyes, that gaze at me
  With the sometime witchery,
  To my inmost spirit speak.
  And remembered ecstacy
  Sweeps my soul again ... I seem
  Dreaming, yet I do not dream.


XII.

  When day dies, lone, forsaken,
  And joy is kissed asleep;
  When doubt's gray eyes awaken,
  And love, with music taken
  From hearts with sighings shaken,
  Sits in the dusk to weep:

  With ghostly lifted finger
  What memory then shall rise?--
  Of dark regret the bringer--
  To tell the sorrowing singer
  Of days whose echoes linger,
  Till dawn unstars the skies.

  When night is gone and, beaming,
  Faith journeys forth to toil;
  When hope's blue eyes wake gleaming,
  And life is done with dreaming
  The dreams that seem but seeming,
  Within the world's turmoil:

  Can we forget the presence
  Of death who walks unseen?
  Whose scythe casts shadowy crescents
  Around life's glittering essence,
  As lessens, slowly lessens,
  The space that lies between.


XIII.

  Bland was that October day,
  Calm and balmy as the spring,
  When we went a forest-way,
  'Neath paternal beeches gray,
  To a valleyed opening:
  Where the purple aster flowered,
  And, like torches shadow-held,
  Red the fiery sumach towered;
  And, where gum-trees sentineled
  Vistas, robed in gold and garnet,
  Ripe the thorny chestnut shelled
  Its brown plumpness. Bee and hornet
  Droned around us; quick the cricket,
  Tireless in the wood-rose thicket,
  Tremoloed; and, to the wind
  All its moon-spun silver casting,
  Swung the milk-weed pod unthinned;
  And, its clean flame on the sod
  By the fading golden-rod,
  Burned the white life-everlasting.
  It was not so much the time,
  Nor the place, nor way we went,
  That made all our moods to rhyme,
  Nor the season's sentiment,
  As it was the innocent
  Carefree childhood of our hearts,
  Reading each expression of
  Death and care as life and love:
  That impression joy imparts
  Unto others and retorts
  On itself, which then made glad
  All the sorrow of decay,
  As the memory of that day
  Makes this day of spring, now, sad.


XIV.

  The balsam-breathed petunias
  Hang riven of the rain;
  And where the tiger-lily was
  Now droops a tawny stain;
  While in the twilight's purple pause
  Earth dreams of Heaven again.

  When one shall sit and sigh,
  And one lie all alone
  Beneath the unseen sky--
  Whose love shall then deny?
  Whose love atone?

  With ragged petals round its pod
  The rain-wrecked poppy dies;
  And where the hectic rose did nod
  A crumbled crimson lies;
  While distant as the dreams of God
  The stars slip in the skies.

  When one shall lie asleep,
  And one be dead and gone--
  Within the unknown deep,
  Shall we the trysts then keep
  That now are done?


XV.

  Holding both your hands in mine,
  Often have we sat together,
  While, outside, the boisterous weather
  Hung the wild wind on the pine
  Like a black marauder, and
  With a sudden warning hand
  At the casement rapped. The night
  Read no sentiment of light,
  Starbeam-syllabled, within
  Her romance of death and sin,
  Shadow-chaptered tragicly.--
  Looking in your eyes, ah me!
  Though I heard, I did not heed
  What the night read unto us,
  Threatening and ominous:
  For love helped my heart to read
  Forward through unopened pages
  To a coming day, that held
  More for us than all the ages
  Past, that it epitomized
  In its sentence; where we spelled
  What our present realized
  Only--all the love that was
  Past and yet to be for us.


XVI.

  'Though in the garden, gray with dew,
  All life lies withering,
  And there's no more to say or do,
  No more to sigh or sing,
  Yet go we back the ways we knew,
  When buds were opening.

  Perhaps we shall not search in vain
  Within its wreck and gloom;
  'Mid roses ruined of the rain
  There still may live one bloom;
  One flower, whose heart may still retain
  The long-lost soul-perfume.

  And then, perhaps, will come to us
  The dreams we dreamed before;
  And song, who spoke so beauteous,
  Will speak to us once more;
  And love, with eyes all amorous,
  Will ope again his door.

  So 'though the garden's gray with dew,
  And flowers are withering,
  And there's no more to say or do,
  No more to sigh or sing,
  Yet go we back the ways we knew
  When buds were opening.


XVII.

  Looking on the desolate street,
  Where the March snow drifts and drives,
  Trodden black of hurrying feet,
  Where the athlete storm-wind strives
  With each tree and dangling light,--
  Centers, sphered with glittering white,--
  Hissing in the dancing snow ...
  Backward in my soul I go
  To that tempest-haunted night
  Of two autumns past, when we,
  Hastening homeward, were o'ertaken
  Of the storm; and 'neath a tree,
  With its wild leaves whisper-shaken,
  Sheltered us in that forsaken,
  Sad and ancient cemetery,--
  Where folk came no more to bury.--
  Haggard grave-stones, mossed and crumbled,
  Tottered 'round us, or o'ertumbled
  In their sunken graves; and some,
  Urned and obelisked above
  Iron-fenced in tombs, stood dumb
  Records of forgotten love.
  And again I see the west
  Yawning inward to its core
  Of electric-spasmed ore,
  Swiftly, without pause or rest.
  And a great wind sweeps the dust
  Up abandoned sidewalks; and,
  In the rotting trees, the gust
  Shouts again--a voice that would
  Make its gaunt self understood
  Moaning over death's lean land.
  And we sat there, hand in hand;
  On the granite; where we read,
  By the leaping skies o'erhead,
  Something of one young and dead.
  Yet the words begot no fear
  In our souls: you leaned your cheek
  Smiling on mine: very near
  Were our lips: we did not speak.


XVIII.

  And suddenly alone I stood
  With scared eyes gazing through the wood.
  For some still sign of ill or good,
  To lead me from the solitude.

  The day was at its twilighting;
  One cloud o'erhead spread a vast wing
  Of rosy thunder; vanishing
  Above the far hills' mystic ring.

  Some stars shone timidly o'erhead;
  And toward the west's cadaverous red--
  Like some wild dream that haunts the dead
  In limbo--the lean moon was led.

  Upon the sad, debatable
  Vague lands of twilight slowly fell
  A silence that I knew too well,
  A sorrow that I can not tell.

  What way to take, what path to go,
  Whether into the east's gray glow,
  Or where the west burnt red and low--
  What road to choose, I did not know.

  So, hesitating, there I stood
  Lost in my soul's uncertain wood:
  One sign I craved of ill or good,
  To lead me from its solitude.


XIX.

  It was autumn: and a night,
  Full of whispers and of mist,
  With a gray moon, wanly whist,
  Hanging like a phantom light
  O'er the hills. We stood among
  Windy fields of weed and flower,
  Where the withered seed pod hung,
  And the chill leaf-crickets sung.
  Melancholy was the hour
  With the mystery and loneness
  Of the year, that seemed to look
  On its own departed face;
  As our love then, in its oneness,
  All its dead past did retrace,
  And from that sad moment took
  Presage of approaching parting.--
  Sorrowful the hour and dark:
  Low among the trees, now starting,
  Now concealed, a star's pale spark--
  Like a fen-fire--winked and lured
  On to shuddering shadows; where
  All was doubtful, unassured,
  Immaterial; and the bare
  Facts of unideal day
  Changed to substance such as dreams.
  And meseemed then, far away--
  Farther than remotest gleams
  Of the stars--lost, separated,
  And estranged, and out of reach,
  Grew our lives away from each,
  Loving lives, that long had waited.


XX.

  There is no gladness in the day
  Now you're away;
  Dull is the morn, the noon is dull,
  Once beautiful;
  And when the evening fills the skies
  With dusky dyes,
  With tired eyes and tired heart
  I sit alone, I sigh apart,
  And wish for you.

  Ah! darker now the night comes on
  Since you are gone;
  Sad are the stars, the moon is sad,
  Once wholly glad;
  And when the stars and moon are set,
  And earth lies wet,
  With heart's regret and soul's hard ache,
  I dream alone, I lie awake,
  And wish for you.

  These who once spake me, speak no more,
  Now all is o'er;
  Day hath forgot the language of
  Its hopes of love;
  Night, whose sweet lips were burdensome
  With dreams, is dumb;
  Far different from what used to be,
  With silence and despondency
  They speak to me.


XXI.

  So it ends--the path that crept
  Through a land all slumber-kissed;
  Where the sickly moonlight slept
  Like a pale antagonist.
  Now the star, that led us onward,--
  Reassuring with its light,--
  Fails and falters; dipping downward
  Leaves us wandering in night,
  With old doubts we once disdained ...
  So it ends. The woods attained--
  Where our heart's desire builded
  A fair temple, fire-gilded,
  With hope's marble shrine within,
  Where the lineaments of our love
  Shone, with lilies clad and crowned,
  'Neath white columns reared above
  Sorrow and her sister sin,
  Columns, rose and ribbon-wound,--
  In the forest we have found
  But a ruin! All around
  Lie the shattered capitals,
  And vast fragments of the walls ...
  Like a climbing cloud,--that plies,
  Wind-wrecked, o'er the moon that lies
  'Neath its blackness,--taking on
  Gradual certainties of wan,
  Soft assaults of easy white,
  Pale-approaching; till the skies'
  Emptiness and hungry night
  Claim its bulk again, while she
  Rides in lonely purity:
  So we found our temple, broken,
  And a musing moment's space
  Love, whose latest word was spoken,
  Seemed to meet us face to face,
  Making bright that ruined place
  With a strange effulgence; then
  Passed, and left all black again.

© Madison Julius Cawein