The things that I can't have I want And what I have seems second-rate,The things I want to do I can't And what I have to do I hate, The things I want at once come late,I am not feeling gay nor gleg, I'm really in an awful state,My life is like a scrambled egg.
If I should order elephant They'd put a camel on my plate,If I should seek a wealthy aunt A poor old uncle'd be my fate, If I should say, "You amputateMy foot, and bring a wooden peg," They'd probably cut off my pate;My life is like a scrambled egg.
The things I want most of are scant, The girls I really love won't mate,The times when rage would make me rant My larynx won't articulate; Should I arrange some morn at eightTo beat my brains out with my leg I'd probably forget the date;My life is like a scrambled egg.
The simplest matters won't come straight, For once I wooed a maid named MegAnd very nearly married Kate; My life is like a scrambled egg.
