Daniel Dwithen, The Wise Chap

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Dan Dwithen wer the chap to show
  His naïghbours mwore than they did know,
  Vor he could zee, wi' half a thought,
  What zome could hardly be a-taught;
  An' he had never any doubt
  Whatever 'twer, but he did know't,
  An' had a-reach'd the bottom o't,
  Or soon could meäke it out.

  Wi' narrow feäce, an' nose so thin
  That light a'most shone drough the skin,
  As he did talk, wi' his red peäir
  O' lips, an' his vull eyes did steäre,
  What nippy looks friend Daniel wore,
  An' how he smiled as he did bring
  Such reasons vor to clear a thing,
  As dather'd vo'k the mwore!

  When woonce there come along the road
  At night, zome show-vo'k, wi' a lwoad
  Ov half the wild outlandïsh things
  That crawl'd, or went wi' veet, or wings;
  Their elephant, to stratch his knees,
  Walk'd up the road-zide turf, an' left
  His tracks a-zunk wi' all his heft
  As big's a vinny cheese.

  An' zoo next mornèn zome vo'k vound
  The girt round tracks upon the ground,
  An' view'd em all wi' stedvast eyes,
  An' wi' their vingers spann'd their size,
  An' took their depth below the brink:
  An' whether they mid be the tracks
  O' things wi' witches on their backs,
  Or what, they coulden think.

  At last friend Dan come up, an' brought
  His wit to help their dizzy thought,
  An' lookèn on an' off the ea'th,
  He cried, a-drawèn a vull breath,
  Why, I do know; what, can't ye zee 't?
  I'll bet a shillèn 'twer a deer
  Broke out o' park, an' sprung on here,
  Wi' quoits upon his veet.

© William Barnes